Acceptance is like Rationalizing, except without the worry, anxiety, and  stress that rationalizing causes. 


If you are one of those faking-it-till-you-make-it people then you really are paying over and over for not taking the time to learn more about acceptance (and the people who secretly cringe and deal with you on a daily basis could be paying too).


There are three


Most people consider the courage needed to do anything as coming from the same pot of courage to do everything else, but that is not the case.  Courage is subject dependent and not genetic.  There are plenty of brave astronauts who have the courage to fly into space but may not have courage  in baseball or water-skiing.  Courage isn't found either; courage comes from performing acts that seem brave at the time, after learning, training and practicing a subject.


There are three


All changes involve grieving, even good changes.  The sole purpose of the brain is to survive, meaning being able to find certainty by predicting what changes have in store for the future. 


Of course this isn't easy, and most of the time the brain can be a lousy fortune-teller, but understanding the relationship between change and grieving is a good way to be prepared to help the brain get it right a little more often.


Are you trying to help a hopeless rationalizer but would be content now simply finding the point that you can cut bait and walk away guilt free?  Walking away takes courage, and courage is learned one topic at a time with one action at a time. 


If that special someone can't find the courage to change here, you can definitely find the courage to finally show them the door here!



Damit.Com is a place to visit when permanent and temporary problems and solutions are getting confused, and good advice is scarce. 

Life doesn't come with very many instructions (out of the box), so life's initial instructions might come from people who's advice is only in their best interests and doesn't fill in many blanks; no, life doesn’t come with an instruction manual at birth; if it did, for men, we probably would leave the manual in the womb or in the box anyway.

As usually happens to some of us, we start assembling our life and we notice that the pieces don’t seem to be fitting together well, some pieces are left over, and the manufacturer (Mom), knows about the product line-up but she is a little sketchy on some of the details regarding the male version. 

But then there are the old farts who have fixed this thing so many times after they really broke the crap out of it over and over and were left stranded too many times to count, but now the damn thing can do almost anything that is asked of it, or there is a little more wisdom in knowing about what shouldn’t be done with it.


This site is filled more with information than advice - more with stories about how other people did things so the reader can decide if they are likely to do the same things or are wanting to get the same results.

It doesn’t do all that much good to look back at what could of happened because there is absolutely no going back - the only path left is forward.



Some other important choices include:


The Veterans Crisis Line connects Veterans in crisis and their families and friends with qualified, caring Department of Veterans Affairs responders through a confidential toll-free hotline, online chat, or text. Veterans and their loved ones can call 1-800-273-8255 and Press 1, chat online, or send a text message to 838255 to receive confidential support 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Support for deaf and hard of hearing individuals is available.


If you would like to donate to help with the expenses and to improve the services you can add  in your message: SEND A PAYPAL INVOICE FOR $$ HOWEVER MUCH you would like to contribute, or just send some money to this Paypal account:


It costs $6 to receive an emailed complete PDF of the website book Life's Instructions I Left in the Box which has a couple extra appendices and a power point that are not available on this site.


This is not a large business that can absorb losses well - If you intend on sharing the PDF book with others please buy their copies too.  If you cannot afford a copy right now then send a message asking for a copy and tell me how many weeks you would like before I should send an invoice.


ICO Jerry Harris

418 W 8th St

Okmulgee, OK 74447


© 2018 by Jerry Harris  Proudly with James Consulting and with

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